"Sir George Sitwell (1860-1943), head of that endemically eccentric family, had seven rooms he used as studies at his family mansion in Derbyshire where he occupied himself in writing such masterpieces as 'The History of the Fork' - none of them ever finished. His chief interest however was landscape gardening. He employed 4,000 men at one time to dig him an artificial lake in the grounds, with wooden towers sticking out of the water from where he could survey his various projects. To improve the view from his study window, he had Chinese willow patterns painted on to his herd of white cows. And a sign on his front door read: 'I must ask anyone entering the house never to contradict me in any way, as it interferes with the functioning of my gastric juices and prevents me sleeping at night.'"
Now, off to watch the rest of the Keeping Up Appearances marathon. Haha superbowl, WHAT?
I love silk scarves. Wear one as a turban: you're a diva, Joan Crawford. Wear one as a scarf, you've gone the other way: it's bon chic bon genre! Use it to tie up your beaux, you're a luxe-ified Marquis de Sade. Instant glamour!
The problem is, I am certain that these scarves are reproducing in my closet, slowly choking out the rest of my accessories like WEEDS and planning to stage a revolution.
They demand attention, these weedy wonders. When I see the massive, heaping, slippery pile of them, it occurs to me a shame that there aren't enough days in the week to wear them all, unless I change turbans at four hour intervals and that requires more commitment to the cause than even I'm willing to make.
Which brings me to my preferred solution: the enormous silk scarf pillow. I love their drama. Like Norma Desmond, these pillows (if you can even call them that) are larger than life. The size makes them a visual production of grand proportions.
So, onto the (IN)DECOROUS drama class:
Select a pillow insert size and cut a square of lining one inch larger around than the pillow. I used a 26" pillow, so my square was 27"x 27". Round the corners (you can use a cup to trace the rounded edges). I used a simple cotton fabric as lining. (And, if you're looking for something even larger, it's definitely possible to find 36" square inserts...)
Lie the lining on the scarf and center it. Pin it in place, and trim the edge.
Then, make the back of the pillow by cutting two rectangles from the lining. You want them to overlap. So, divide the length of the pillow in half and add around 5 or 6 inches of fabric to that number to get the length of each rectangle. For this 26" pillow, that would mean two rectangles, both measuring 27"x 18.5". The 18.5" thing isn't an exact science though, so don't sweat it. Place the lining on the fabric you plan to use for the pillow back, pin it and trim it. Round the corners so they match up with the front. Fold the middle piece over and hem it.
If you're using edging (you don't need to), pin it onto the pillow front (good side), facing inward towards the center of the pillow. Then pin the backs onto the pillow, good sides facing in. So it's a big pillow sandwich. When the whole thing is pinned, it should look thoroughly inside out.
Sew it. By hand...by machine... either way works. Was that clear?
So next time your scarves start acting up, put them in their place. Few things make me as happy as dramatic proportions.